Wednesday, August 23, 2006

Like to hear it? Here it goes...

San Antonio natives are fully aware that 100-and-something year old sportscaster Dan Cook coined the phrase "it ain't over until the fat lady sings." I especially know this because we are close and personal friends with this guy, weather personality extraodinaire Bill Taylor. (Like that? Like how I dropped the celebrity-bomb in the middle of my blog? Guess what? A former member of En Vogue lives in my house in San Antonio...we've got superstar connections all over the hizzle. I'm thinking of buying some skinny jeans and great big sunglasses to prove I know famous people. And a well publicized eating disorder isn't completely out of the question).

So if a sportscaster can coin a phrase, why can't I? Am I right? How hard is it? You put some words together, use them, and get millions and millions of other people to use them. So I'm trying some new catchphrases out...let me know what you think:

When did you get so fat? You used to be cute but...geeze, you look like crap.
Skank I ain't, I whore no more.
You look like you just sold your soul to the Devil.
That tastes like poop on broccoli (actually coined by Juliet).
Your teeth are too Duff. You should get them redone.
Give that baby a suckerfier (Ava's contribution to lexicon).
What chu talkin' 'bout, bastard?
I may be trailer trash, but at least I'm 'Merican.
I may be trailer trash, but at least I know my baby daddy. One of my baby daddy.
I may be trailer trash. Yes. I am trailer trash.
I pity the mentally defecient!
Slinkies! (This is to be used when figuring out an important clue in a mystery).
Zada zing, zada zoom! (This is to be used by surburban mobsters of Italian origins.)
Konichiwa, cowboy! (stolen from 1980s/1990s come-to -Texas commericals, not used nearly enough).
No dammy, no dammy, no dammy! (This will be used when I launch my new gameshow , Dress Your Duck).

So...I think this is a good start. I'm quite on my way to immortaldomnification.

Peace out. Word to your mutha.

http://here-in-idaho.blogspot.com/

4 Comments:

Blogger The Flip Flop Mamma! said...

Girl you kill me!!

Oh, and please don't wear skinny jeans. What's with that anyway??? Hello..80's is not cute!!!!!!!

8/24/2006 12:27:00 PM  
Blogger Kristen said...

The skinny jeans...and the big glasses....such a great look.

And your catch-phrases?! Too funny. You are too funny.

8/25/2006 07:31:00 AM  
Blogger Mrs. Chicky said...

Dress your Duck? I so want to be a contestant on that one. I'll wear my skinny jeans and big sunglasses.

8/27/2006 05:29:00 AM  
Blogger allrileyedup said...

I vote for this one: "I may be trailer trash. Yes. I am trailer trash."

Ever seen the Chapelle Show racial draft sketch? Konichiwa, bitches!

8/27/2006 09:10:00 PM  

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